Thursday, March 26, 2009

Czech Prime Minister ousted for anti-Obama rhetoric

After spouting negative comments about Barack Obama’s economic maneuvers, Czech Prime Minister Mirek Topolanek was dealt a devastating vote of no confidence by his parliament. Topolanek, who concurrently serves as EU President, described the American president’s stimulus package as “a way to hell” while preparing for next week’s crucial EU G-20 meeting in Paris. Now the embattled Prime Minister is scrambling to recover before Barack Obama himself comes to Prague for a scheduled visit.

“Mr. Topolanek should have known better,” Jiri Paroubek, head of the opposing party that lead the vote of no confidence, told reporters yesterday. “Europe has a very firm, no-tolerance policy when it comes to slandering Obama. Think back to the months before the US elections. Did you hear any negative talk whatsoever about Barack Obama? No. None. Not in the media, not in the political chambers, not in the drunken hooligan brawls. What was he thinking?”

Paroubek had been trying to oust the Prime Minister for months, and the negative comments gave him exactly what he needed to seal the deal. The Czech parliament voted overwhelmingly in opposition to Topolanek, many of them casting their votes with hot tears streaming down their faces over the “very hurtful things he said about Mr. Obama.”

After hearing the news from his hotel room in Paris, Topolanek rushed home to Prague to do some damage control. However, upon reaching the border outside of the German city of Chemnitz, the Prime Minister discovered that the locks at the border had been changed, and that he had no way to get in. Dejected, he was forced to drive to Berlin and stay overnight at a Youth Hostel to figure things out.

“It was horrible,” Topolanek said today. “The particular hostel I visited had a large group of German backpackers and about a dozen spoiled American study abroad students. They wouldn’t stop harassing me over what I had said about ‘the great Obama.’ Was I scared for my life? No. Everyone knows that these Obama supporters are a bunch of nancies when it comes to fighting. But I certainly didn’t get the sleep I needed.”

US Press Secretary Robert Gibbs informed the media that the previously planned trip to the Czech Republic is now in question. Initial plans are to delay the meeting, but it may be canceled altogether.

“People know where we stand with things like this,” Gibbs said. “Our rhetoric and history shows that we are happy to sit down at the tables of our enemies. But we are less inclined to sit with those who outright insult us. We snubbed Fox News. We snubbed Rush Limbaugh. We will likely snub Topolanek.”

No comments:

Post a Comment